If I could only say one thing about Jackie, it would be to hire her immediately (and then make her be friends with you). My husband and I got married in Buffalo, but we live in Maryland so didn't actually meet her in-person until the wedding day. She held calls with us whenever we needed them, at which point she walked us through the timeline and how to work with other vendors. On the big day, she put everyone at ease, but she also had contingency plans and kept the entire day flowing perfectly, which is no easy feat with families as large as ours. I can't even tell you how many guests approached us to tell us how great Jackie is (which I think doesn't happen often with other photographers?), and my mother actually said "I'm sure she has a great family, but can she join ours?" and still wants her to come over for dinner.

I expected to feel empowered, sexy, all that good stuff, and I expected to get beautiful pictures on the other side. All that proved true. Jackie not only made me feel comfortable and confident, but she managed to do so while honoring my gender: I never once felt pressure to perform womanhood, but neither was I excluded from playing there. I’ve seldom gotten to feel as pretty & delicate & sparkly without also feeling subjugated, overly witnessed, or misinterpreted. My gender is red lipstick and big curves, strong jaws and wide gestures, choppy haircuts and a wink. Not a girl, but not uninspired by femininity. What I did not expect was how it feels to look at these pictures now, more than six months later. The body in these pictures is still so much sicker than the body I live in today, & even if I’m the only person who can see that in these images, it is remarkable to have a record of such joy and gender euphoria amid illness, remarkable to know the person standing in the “I just killed my husband” robe in the first slide needed to rest all afternoon to recover from a few hours of fun. It’s also remarkable to be able to look back at this body, know how sick I felt in it, and still find it beautiful. That big happy is palpable, visible, and real even though I was, even though I am, also chronically ill. These are pictures of a disabled body and that body is sexy as hell. I’m grateful for this specific moment of body love, that I will always look back at it & remember: I can be so happy here.

Photography is one of the most essential parts of your big day. To remember uncle Charlie sneaking an early cake pop party favor, or to capture a pizza serenade (Jackie you just get me), Jackie is there to capture these moments. Sure she’s great at posed photos, but what she has is the brilliant talent for catching your most intimate moments without even trying. Jackie was an honorary sixth bridesmaid, and her service was above and beyond. Your biggest mistake would be to NOT hire Jackie. She is instrumental in making your wedding the day you’ve always dreamed of.